STRICTLY Come Dancing, the glossy, jazz-handy, sequin-heavy staple of Saturday night television, faces the biggest crisis in its 20-year history.
Should the BBC’s “evidence gathering” find against problematic dancer Giovanni Pernice, not only will it cause seismic shocks across the show, but the landscape for all other reality TV formats will be changed for ever.
The cracks are already starting to show.
Online, you’re either Team Gio or Team Amanda. As was ever thus with social media tribalism, there is no in between.
Largely, the housewives of Great Britain seem to think it impossible that their darling boy could do the things of which he stands accused.
One of which is stamping on Amanda Abbington’s foot. And on Sunday, Strictly make-up artist Lisa Armstrong— Ant McPartlin’s ex’s — waded in, “liking” her pal Gio’s statement of denial.
In it, Gio wrote: “You will be as surprised as I am that allegations have been made about my dance-teaching methods in the media this week.
Nancy Xu, Carlos Gu and Luba Mushtuk have all been supportive of Amanda’s recent Instagram posts.
“Of course, I reject any suggestion of abusive or threatening behaviour, and I look forward to clearing my name.
“Those who have followed my journey on Strictly Come Dancing over the last decade will know I am passionate and competitive.”
Another ex-Strictly contestant, Jamie Laing, who was runner-up in 2020, also liked the statement, and two of Gio’s previous partners, Debbie McGee and Michelle Visage, have defended the star publicly.
Judge Shirley Ballas has previously also come out swinging, describing the dancer as an “absolute gentleman”.
Intriguingly, Gio’s fellow pros have been less effusive.
Nancy Xu, Carlos Gu and Luba Mushtuk have all been supportive of Amanda’s recent Instagram posts.
But what of the other celebs who’ve been paired with him? Many remain eerily quiet.
Ranvir Singh, we’re told, was deeply unhappy with her partner’s training methods and reportedly met up with Amanda and Laura Whitmore — the other named legal complainant— to swap war stories.
Yet the presenter still has one of her official Strictly photos as her Instagram profile pic. Her experience, then, couldn’t have been that haunting.
Are we pandering to privileged celebrities?
And why did it take the BBC six months to launch a probe, after initial reports of a fall-out with Amanda emerged — and, crucially, given Gio’s public record of upsetting partners?
So what is the truth? Is Gio strict but fair — a taskmaster, not a bully?
In reality, are we pandering to a bunch of privileged, oversanitised celebrities — whose idea of a hard day’s work is slapping on some stage make-up and learning a few lines?
Never has a former professional athlete — used to hard graft and pushing their body to the extreme — complained about his or her experience on the show.
But whatever happens, there’s no way back for Giovanni on Strictly. And Strictly rules, surely, will be changed to the detriment of the winning formula.
Will bosses be forced to reduce training hours to accommodate precious stars, for example?
This could well be the end of Saturday night telly as we know it.
Certainly, cameras will now be recording their every move — on and off air, Big Brother-style.
And if the Beeb finds against Giovanni, other broadcasters — who stream properly hardcore shows such as Celebrity SAS: Who Dares Wins, Netflix’s new Bear Hunt or Special Forces: The Ultimate Test — will be bricking it.
This could well be the end of Saturday night telly as we know it.
I can’t put my finger on what’s wrong with King’s pic
LOTS of furore this past week over artist Jonathan Yeo’s fiery portrait of the King.
I quite like the work, right.
My only real area of concern is Charles’s long, sausagey fingers. While we all know they rank pretty high up on the Wall’s Official Chart of Chipolata, they’re not giant bloody flippers as rendered here.
Now the artist has come out to explain his latest work, revealing the butterfly above the King’s right shoulder, for example, “signifies metamorphosis and rebirth”.
Not, as one critic claimed, to appease a five-year-old schoolgirl.
Frankly, Charles had a lucky escape – an earlier Yeo picture of George W. Bush, below, was made from porn mags.
Fiona’s reality cheque
In least surprising news of the week (granted, it’s only Tuesday), the “real Martha” from Baby Reindeer has more previous form for stalking.
Fiona Harvey also bombarded Sir Keir Starmer with a number of disturbing emails.
Evidently the Scottish antihero, whose interview with Piers Morgan has been watched by more than ten million people, is fragile and riddled with issues.
She’s being offered lucrative personal appearance fees left, right and centre, and doubtless could be appearing later this year on a TV ice rink or in the Australian jungle.
She needs to hire a PR adviser now – one with her best interests at heart, not just money.
TikTok addicts are three times more likely to vape, a new study has shown.
The rapid, short-form, quick-fire nature of tomorrow’s generation – scrolling through one meme, reel or “story” then on to the next nanoseconds later, for hours on end – means this comes as no surprise.
Increasingly we are all developing the attention spans of toddlers on E numbers, and more needs to be done to refocus collective young minds.
Baby at 50 is okay for Ant
ANT McPARTLIN has just become a dad and turns 50 next year.
Not one word has been said about his age – relatively mature for a biological first-timer.
Were he a woman, there’d have been endless thinkpieces about the struggles of bringing up a child in your fifties, and debate over whether doing so is selfish. (It’s not.)
It’s yet another stark reminder about how different things are for men and women.
SO, the Rich List came out, telling us what we already knew: the rich get richer, while no one else does.
Can’t say I especially care that a Beatle [Paul McCartney] is now a billionaire, and Harry Styles and Dua Lipa, above, need never work again.
Such levels of wealth are so off my radar as to make them utterly irrelevant. Next, please.
Doras’s a cash hound
LOYAL lovely readers, and trolls, this may well be my last ever column.
On Friday, I received an email from an influencer offering to make my miniature dachshund, Dora, a star.
“She would be a perfect dog celebrity,” wrote Phil. “Let’s make her a STAR. I genuinely think she’d do well on Instagram, and we should probably make her her own meme account. I’d be her agent.
“Are you interested?”
Very, Phil. Very.
This little bitch lives rent-free, hasn’t worked a day in her life, and once turned down a Morrisons chicken breast, only eating the proffered back-up from M&S.
Let her start paying her own way.
A NEW French road safety campaign is urging men to “drive like women”.
According to the Victims And Citizens Association, women are safer, more cautious drivers. They’re right.
However, in my experience – and it UTTERLY PAINS me to write it – the majority of men are better drivers than women.
If I’m sighing in exasperation at an incompetent/slow/hesitant Sunday morning driver, and look in their rear-view mirror, seven times out of ten it’ll be a woman dawdling gormlessly behind the wheel.
THIS must be the worst casting in movie history– well, since 5ft 7in Tom Cruise cast 5ft 7in Tom Cruise as giant Jack Reacher.
Gen Z heart-throb Jacob Elordi, 6ft 5in, above left, plays a young Richard Gere, above right, a man eight inches shorter than him, in the veteran star’s latest film, called Oh, Canada.
Ah, actors and egos.